Alcohol was my security blanket.

Alcohol was my security blanket.

Did you have a favorite stuffed animal or blanket that you carried around with you as a child? Or do your kids have one that they need at all times to feel safe or to fall asleep?

That's what I felt like alcohol was to me. It was my security blanket. It kept me "safe". Without it, I wasn't able to handle my emotions or sometimes even fall asleep.

The level at which I "needed" alcohol changed through the years because that's what happens with the progression of addiction. It gets worse and worse until you need it to survive.

I needed it to handle social situations.
I needed it to feel sexy.
I needed it to feel confident.
I needed it to make me feel happy.
I needed it to make me feel nothing at all.
I needed it for comfort.

At the end of my addiction, I carried alcohol around with me wherever I went. I filled up water bottles with vodka. I filled up my Yeti with wine. In the last couple of months of my drinking, I even had a bottle of wine on my nightstand so that when I woke up in the middle of the night with anxiety, I could drink it to fall back to sleep.

If I didn't have any alcohol in the house or with me at all times, I would panic. I thought I would either go through withdrawal or that I would have a panic attack in public with everyone watching me lose my sh*t.

Alcohol was the thing that soothed me and made everything ok, but it's a trap. Alcohol never made anything ok; it made everything ten times worse. Alcohol tricks us into thinking that we wouldn't survive without it, but trust me, you can.

Alcohol keeps us complacent and not truly living the one life we're given. When we remove it, we're left feeling panicky and wondering how we will get by without it? But eventually, the panic subsides, and you see it's not so bad after all. You don't need alcohol to keep you comfortable anymore because you've shown yourself you can do things without it.

I have ONE spot left for the Bye, Bye Booze...Hello Freedom 30 Day 1:1 Coaching Program. If you want it, message me (@sobermomcoach), and we can chat to see if it would be a good fit for you!