Mommy doesn't need wine.
Mommy just needs a break.

Back in my drinking days, I thought wine was the answer to my stress, to my overwhelm, to my anxiety, and to being the "perfect" mom.

Boy, was I wrong. The answer was I needed a break! I couldn't keep doing it all on my own, and I was scared to ask for help. I didn't want anyone to think I was weak and couldn't handle the "situation" I put myself in. That situation being a single mom, and as I'm typing this, I realize I wasn't the only one who put me in that situation. It takes two to make a baby, right? Anyway, I digress, and that topic is for another day.

I was bombarded by advertising, mommy wine memes, and society telling me just to have a glass of wine to take the edge off the stresses of everyday life. I wish I hadn't followed the crowd, and now I truly believe that when you're following the crowd, you lose yourself, which when I got sober, I started to look at a lot of things differently. I started to question other things...

One of my favorite women in this sober community asked me a question last week in my stories. It was pretty profound and made me take a step back, so I told her I would answer it for my 3 year soberversary blog post. Her question was, "How proud of yourself are you that you started such a successful and inspirational place for women to share and bond? How do you go about telling non-sober women what you do when asked?”

On 11/14/16 when I stepped foot into detox I had no idea where I’d be 3 years later. I mean I didn’t even know if this was my “rock bottom”. I had tried to get sober two other times before this and thought I could moderate, and look at where it got me. Would that same mindset lead me to slip up yet again? Not this time my friends. This time was different. The hell of racing thoughts, blurry vision, and wondering if I was going to die from these withdrawals was what I needed to be like, “Alyson cut the shit! Because if you...

Yesterday I had posted on the @sobermomtribe Instagram page about options and how we can’t tell anyone how they SHOULD get and stay sober. We all have a unique journey, past, and many other circumstances that shape what path will work best for us. In no way was I saying that AA was bad. In fact, I listed AA as an option, and a choice that I had tried at the beginning of my journey and it wasn’t my thing. But that’s ok. I had other tools in my toolbox that have kept me over 3.5 years sober. 

I had posted other options that people may use, such as coaching, therapy, podcasts, quit lit, etc. You get the idea. Of course, I knew that someone would eventually come on and defend AA, which is fine; that’s their path and they are passionate about what has worked for them. Then it turned ugly. People who were advocating AA saying that if you don’t do AA, then there’s no way to achieve long term sobriety. That if you’re not in AA, then...